Wednesday, January 4, 2012

A tale of woe



  The top seemed peculiar; no fan could be seen hanging. The blanket wrapping my body too looked odd and old. A neighbourhood rooster crowed once then twice and then silent, completely silent, indicating that it was already in the morning. Ohhed-ahhed, I straighten up my nerves. I stood on my feet; the cold that I used to feel upon stepping on the floor could not be felt that day. I slowly tiptoed and unopened the door widely. For a minute, I stood in front of the door, no-one else could be seen, neither mum nor dad. The surge of angry, sad and betrayed overwhelmed me that unshed tears occupied my eyes. My face twisted in a grimace of sorrow, a child looking for his parents straight from bed. The clinking of metals can be heard from the kitchen, I stormed to kitchen, burst out crying. Soon after that, pairs of rough, warm hands circled me, calming the aggrieved me. It was a lot of relief, touch of healing. She’d then give me her nice words telling me that mum and dad were gone for work and they will get me something once they returned. The twisted face morphed to neutral. She grabbed my Donald duck backpack which mum had stashed some clothes and toys inside, unbuttoned my pyjamas, and then led me straight to the bathroom which door made of zinc. 

Pails and after pails of water being poured onto my head, accompanied by her singing of ancient, never-heard-of song. The water was really cold that I shivered and my nails turned to slightly blue. I looked up, she was wearing a black scarf covered half of her head unveils some of her greys. She sat me on a chair in front of a mirror then after awhile of make-over session, the image of a geek boy could be seen emerged in the mirror reflecting my image. I was amazed by how she had transformed me from out-of-bed look into this. “Mari make(makan)” she raised her hoarse voice. A plate of fried rice and a cup half full of ‘Teh Susu’(Milk Tea)were readily being served on the wooden table. The table looked exactly like the flotsam and jetsam that had been washed ashore. I took a deep scrutinize into the plate, there were a lot of green leafy veggies and kedgerees could be seen. “Mok, banyok sayur dop sedap!” I groaned of too much veggies and I hated it so bad. There were no chicken frankfurters, eggs just how mum served me in the morning. “Ehh! Tok leh keno make sayur!” She replied. Oh god! I loathed her for luring me into something I hate. 

Whenever my parents go for work, I’ll have to stay with her till night depending on the day. Sometimes I need to stay overnight. Dad and mum seemed so busy with their work. Dad was always outstation, but once he returned, there was no regret, it was always something he bought me home. There was a day, I need to stay overnight and I hated it. She sat closely beside me, munching on the ‘sireh’. My aunt the youngest sister of my mum was still schooling at that time. She was resting on her chest jotting something on her book. I sat leaning to a wall, scanning through every corner of this wooden house. At a distance, puff of smokes could be seen. I always fascinated about the fire or smoke, I was a pyromaniac, but she sternly warned me not to get close to that smoke. It’s poison. It was crucial for it to be kept ignited the whole night, to keep mosquitoes away from us. Sometimes, when I got mosquitoes bite, my skin would swell into florid, and she would spit some of her ‘sireh’ on the affected area. It was seriously disgusting, but there was no effort of removing it, in fact I’ll let it dried and washed afterwards. I continued watching the telly. The programme was ridiculously crap! I loathed it so much. I wished I could go home, sleeping in air-conditioned room, no mosquitoes and most important is that I could watch anything I love. But I was binned here. I was getting sleepy that she led me to her room. There was my Donald Duck backpack close to my pillow where I rested my head. Beside me, it was her pillow where she’d sleep. Her husband would sleep on the bed under the mosquitoes net. He was just like Captain Hook where every child afraid of him, including me. I rarely made eye contact with him, and he rarely spoke to me either. Better in that way cause he was just like a Cerberus when he was angry. The best part finally arrived, when she would lie and began her bedtime stories while at the same time tapping on my hip. It was the same story being told over and over again, magically I never tired of hearing it; in fact there were always lot and lot of questions that I’ll ask once she finished her story. The story would always about ‘Sang Kancil dan Harimau’, ‘Bawang Putih Bawang Merah’, ‘Mat Jenin’, ‘Batu Belah Batu Bertangkup’ and ‘Askar Jepun’. The story was really soothing. There was some days where I purposely told her I want to ‘shit’ though I was not and she would tell me “Oghe dop berak male-male buto nih! Ado bok-bom”. Then she’ll started singing while tapping lightly on my arse,

“Tidur...Jubo tidur
Tidur Dalam Lalang,
Tidur Jubo tidur
Jangan ajar berak malam.

p/s: I’m sorry for the word Jubo(ass).It’s vital to maintain the originality.
I was almost burst out laughing upon catching this song. The song was really ridiculous but that’s the song she sung me every time I asked to ‘shit’ in the night. Well sometimes its work, sometimes it’s not. 

I grew older day by day. I grew a lot mischievous too. Every time dad and mum off to work, I’ll stay with her even after school. The school bus would drop me off in front of her house. From a distance, I could see her in the kitchen busy preparing the lunch for the whole family. She was really a good cook, traditional food I’d say. She sucks at modern cuisine! After school I supposedly to attend religious class organized by a wife of Imam near to her house. Sometimes I’d skip the class, mostly I did. She’d nag at me like hell, and then reported every detail to my parents. I hated her for god sake! There was a time when I purposely disturbed the hens and without realization I broke one of its eggs. She learnt it then she told Captain Hook and the next thing I learnt, I was being kept imprisoned in the ‘Rebang Ayam’(chicken house/coop) behind her house. I was sitting on the ground inside the coop, crying, wishing that my parents would instantly emerge. It was her came to get me. I was so blind, so blind that I could not see her. All I knew was I love my other granny, my father’s mother. She’s rich. She was always getting me things I want and would always give me a lot of money. I solely saw the money, money could buy the happiness. I was so blind, blind that I could not see her.

To be continued...

Sunday, November 13, 2011

Don't cry no tears




credit pic: http://www.123rf.com/




Ok did you still remember when I told u guys that I’ll tell you how in the world I have two mothers?(my story) Ok so sorry for being keeping this for quite awhile...and as I have already promise you guys that I’ll tell you someday and maybe today is the day so please be with me a little while. Do you think that it is awkward or maybe should I call bizarre to have two mothers?

I could still remember when I was 6-year-old, I was quite good student, with a good achievement in reading, singing, dancing and whole lot more that I was being successfully selected to be one of the nominees for ‘Pelajar Kemas terbaik setiap Daerah’ (aku pelajar kemas kat kampung je nama kampung tu Telosan. Aw by the way, my former kindergarten teacher told me that I was her good student, so cerita tu betul sumer yg kat atas tu). I couldn’t understand why in the world that my mum and dad were so happy to see me receiving a piece of certificate by someone important on stage all I know at that time was there will be great feast served afterwards. As soon as I got the certificate, on my big day, I saw my dad packed his stuff in a bag, judging from the size of the luggage, my dad will be going somewhere for a long time. I saw my mum cried, and at that time there was a sharp pain that I could hardly bare and I don’t understand what was that means and when I approached mum, she quickly wiped her tears. I know something bad had happened that my mum’s tears were rolling down on his rosy cheeks. Though I was so frigging young, I know something was not right going on and I tried to avert my nasty feeling toward my toys on the floor. I grabbed my all-time favourite red, big lorry toys on the floor and started to squeal ‘Vroom....vroom’ as if my big lorry was a real lorry with tonnes of sand on its container when dad slowly approached me and put me on his lap. He told me that he’ll be going to Kuala Lumpur for work and I have to stay home with mum. I said okay to him though I know exactly where Kuala Lumpur is in the first place and I assured myself that everything will be perfectly fine soon.

After awhile, I was with mum and whenever there was break from school, my mum and I would off to Kuala Lumpur and for a few earlier months we were staying at hotel in Kuala Lumpur and this went on until my father got his own house in Kuala Lumpur.  At that time meeting up with my dad was pivotal that I don’t mind anything else even if I need something like toys of my dream, I won’t tell him I’ll just keep it in me, what most important at that time was I can be with my dad and that was all I’m asking for. I could still remember when I was about 8 year-old, it was Eid 2000, when I was firstly meet my step mother known as Syira, and I didn’t even know who the hell she was but one thing for sure, the feeling that I was having at those moment was really not good, for the first time in my life I watched other woman sitting beside my father in a car. There was nothing I could do but to watch my mum’s place being snatched away by the woman. Seriously I despise her so much that you guys would never imagine and I wanna go home to my mum and embrace her. As soon as I got home, I told mum everything about the woman and bla..bla and mysteriously and ridiculously my mum was laughing instead of throwing her tantrum. When I asked her who she was, she replied me in a short and confidently ‘Bini abah jugak!’. 
I was shocked by my mum statement and I was about to scream out of my head upon learning the fact that my dad is having another wife, and there were some scenes from movies like snow white, Cinderella, Bawang Putih Bawang Merah reeled into my thought at that moment. I reckoned that my future life would be something exactly like what the story portrayed, where I’ll be the slave of the house, need to clean this,that,then those, these and bla-bla...

It was Jun 2002 when I discovered that my dad is having a son with his second wife,  Syira. My dad went back home and informed us the news, in fact he brought home the picture of Alif Imran Bin Mohd Saljie. I was so frustrated to finally learn that I am not gonna be the only son for my dad. The feeling of jealousy seemed to get better of me that I ripped apart the picture of him into pieces. My dad hasn’t learnt that. I felt like, every hour, second of my dad was for him. I used to be flooded with the toys and all of a sudden I noticed that he rarely bought me one. I felt so envy, especially when I went to my second mother’s house or ‘ibu’ that’s the call that I need to call her. It’s a little awkward to call stranger in the family as Ibu. 

So from the day onwards, my life is something like KL-KB, KB-KL. Sometimes we travel by bus, and sometimes by car and sometimes by plane. I’ve been travelling back and forth from Kuala Lumpur to Kelantan for quite some time and to tell you the truth, life like this was really tiring, but it’s....ok fun..

Well, my mum or umi is still with my abah, they don’t go separate ways, and that’s something good, Alhamdullilah. But the relationships between these two mothers are not that excellent, as a matter of fact they are far away to the word excellent as they can’t get along each other well, so I just don’t give damn about them, what most important now is my relationship with my abah, umi, Alif, and ibu is good, having brother isn’t that bad and I’m kind of loving the way we are living now, but of course I’m hoping and pray for better.

My childhood experience is the one that define who I am today. I love to think big that some people would never think of that and I love my abah, umi, adik and to tell the truth I’m still learning to love my step mother, she won’t see this, it’s okay...  (HEHEHE)

 I really hope that my father can read this, I wanted him to know how I felt about him and the way we’re living now, I would never go and tell him what I’ve just written here in front of him, I somehow hope that someday Abah can read this...and for Abah, I really don’t mind for what had happened, let bygone be bygone...The future of our family is still bright, and I hope Abah can sort this out sooner or later, I really wanted to see someday during Hari Raya we can take picture as a real family, there are Abah in the middle between  Umi and Ibu and I will be standing behind with Alif. I hope I can see this picture very soon in future...


credit pic:simplethoughtssimplewords.wordpress

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

The Legal Age


Credit picture:
http://www.zazzle.com/

 
17th January 1991, that’s the day when I was born and now I am 20 year-old and pretty soon in coming less than 2 months I’m turning 21 year-old. That’s the legal age and soon I’ll be man! By the age of 21 I should have known my own real identity, or else I will end up having confusion about my roles in life for the rest of my life. I can’t spend the rest of my day to find myself and it has to be when I am 21! But, to tell you the truth, I still don’t know which part of roles I’m in. Few years before, I can say that I spent my lifetime pondering upon questions of identity. I was more concerned about what I appear to be in the eyes of others instead of what I really feel I am.

Something for sure, teacher would be my profession in coming more 4 years and I still can’t see a picture of me being in front of the classroom talking, teaching, and fraternizing with the nations. Seriously talking, I don’t wanna be teacher in school for the rest of my life. I want to do something that I’ll trade everything for it; you know the kind of work field where the awesomeness is seemingly revolving around us every day and we can’t wait for the next days and I wanna be that. 

As for now, I’m having my final examination for this semester and afterwards I’m gonna have my long break until early next year 2012 and I’ll be turning 21.  Okay, the watch struck sharply at 11 pm and I should be on bed now, tomorrow I have Language Development paper that will take 3 hours starting from 8.30 am until 11.30 am. Wish me luck!

P/s:
*20 is a helluva adventure, and I’m waiting and preparing what ‘21’ has to offer me!*

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Mak cik kerepek/ The Lady Tapioca cracker




This maybe sound a little lame, but who cares! I've finally owned my own channel on youtube. The first video which I have uploaded on my channel entitled Mak Cik Kerepek was actually a part of my final drama when I was in UiTM..hope you'll like it! Be nice, it's my first video on the channel..




The clear picture of mak cik kerepek


Final Exam Strike!

It's crazy over here!!! The final exam will be coming pretty soon and with tonnes of things that need for some revision a little bit here and there, I'd say it's crazy and I'm really freaking afraid that I might not do the right thing during this upcoming examination that finally would make my life misery...Hope everything will be just okay..Hoping to write something good not just another trashy writing very soon..

Till the next post..

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Healthy, Tasty Mug cake





Craving for Choc cake?? You wanna eat choc cake so freaking bad?? Too much calories?? But still wanna eat it?? Bake your own choc cake then..Dont know??

Now I have the solution for your craving! The typical chocolate cake contains lots of butter, sugars which high in fat and calories as well. Is there any other way to actually omit those excess calories and fat?? Yes there is. 

Bake your own cake then you can control all of these calories. Don’t know how to bake a cake?? I’ll teach you here and now...Stop drooling over it!! 

These are the ingredients you need to have in your kitchen:

1.    2 tablespoon of High-protein flour
2.    Egg
3.    1 tablespoon of cocoa powder
4.    1 teaspoon of sugar (i’ve reduced the sugar)
5.    1 scoop of (protein powder)* Awesome Mass Chocolate/Muscle Juice Chocolate preferably*

6.    Cooking choc/ chocolate bar/ chocolate chips
7.    Sprinkle of Vanilla essence
8.    8 teaspoon of milk(low-fat)


How to make it?

First and foremost, this chocolate cake also known as protein chocolate cake, and it is very suitable for those who’ve been to the gym, concerned about the food that goes in and this will be your perfect protein snack recipe as it can supply the protein that will be needed to repair those muscles and thus leading to a lean, bigger muscle.

Ok let’s skip the foreplay, getting back to where we paused...

1.    You will need a mug.
2.    Put the flour, cocoa powder, sugar, protein powder(you can omit this if you want) into a mug
3.    Now, break an egg into the mug and whisk it with a fork.
4.    Then pour milk into the mug
5.    Mix all the ingredients well until sticky-thick
6.    Now splash the vanilla essence and mix well again
7.    Now put the chocolate chips/ chopped chocolate bar into the mug and mix well.
8.    Microwave it for 3 minutes.
9.    Then enjoy your scrumptious instant chocolate cake!!....
Sticky-thick ingredients (well-mix)

Put it in a microwave


Microwave it for about 3 mins

Final product (It may doesn't look tempting, but trust me it has great taste on your bud)



 (I was using vanilla protein powder, no choc being added into, so it was pure white in colour, and to serve it, I sprinkle some of the Hershey Chocolate syrup on my mug cake and accompanied with a hot cadburry choc drink..It'll be a day to be remembered! So simple, easy, faster and healthy..

Eat well & live well....happy trying!

Sunday, October 2, 2011

Savouring the moment in every sip of Hot choc!









 Oh shit! I burned my lips, sorry for interrupting..my hot choc was so hot that I couldn't even take a sip
Carry on, just ignore me







Tata for now! See you soon guys